113 days

I am so frustrated. I feel like I am living the same thing over and over again. I went through the period of my step dad being grumpy and frustrated because of his insecurities of not having a job and I went through my husband doing it once and now I am back there again. I feel like nothing in life is secure. Not even a job. We now have no more security. My bank has continued to be over and over again overdrawn and that was before my husband lost his job. I am so in disarray. We have no money, no prospects. Even I have been looking for a job which I am absolutely not supposed to be doing. Everyone seems to think I should be at 100% or happy about my life. I am not, I have nothing anymore. Everything that used to belong to me no longer does. Even my kids, the only one that attached to me is my son and that's just because I don't favor my daughter like everyone else does. I don't know anymore. I want to run away and never come back. That's honestly how I feel right now. Nothing is going even remotely right. We can't even get one income in this house. I don't know anymore. What is the point of life except for struggles. Nothing good ever comes.