213 days

213 days-7 months later and it is still a daily battle for me! No one will ever truly know how my world spun that day; how things changed forever. It's hard to even explain the feelings that come to mind now. How different things are compared to how they used to be. My world made more sense then. It's like my whole world got tossed around; jumbled up into pieces and my senses became clearer or fussier depending on how you look at it. I began to analyze everything around me. My world became full of whys. Why am I living like this? Why am I so alone? Is this really as happy as I will ever get? My perfect world fell apart. I still have a lot of anger towards the people that pushed me to evaluate the perfection I thought I had. I did everything and I did it happily. Now I can barely do anything and everything is a battle. I don't even remember what it is like to be happy. The last memory I have of happiness is that day. The peace I felt that I would never feel again.